Being Mom

I'm a Mom to 3 amazing kids; J is my 7 year old son, T is my 4 year old son and C is my 4 year old daughter - yes T&C are twins ;)

(chloe, jonathan and thomas taken christmas 2010)


I'm not sure if it's the cold weather, not being able to get outside as much or what's going on but my patience has been lacking lately and it's not good. More times than I am proud to admit I drop my kids off at daycare, get back into my truck and cry because I was impatient with them. Does it really matter if I'm 15 minutes late to work? Does it really matter if they didn't get dressed quickly enough? Does it really matter if one of them changes their minds about what they want on their toast? Does it really matter if they want a different sippy cup for their milk than the one I gave them?

No, none of it matters. I should not sweat the small stuff.

What matters is that my babies, my sweet sweet babies are seeing their mom get upset over stupid stuff. Like really stupid stuff. Stuff so stupid I'm embarrassed to even think about.

(jonathan and i on his first day of gr 2, sept 2013)


The other night I was making homemade pasta sauce with homemade meatballs and J comes over and asks what we are having for dinner. I said pasta sauce with meatballs. He rolled his eyes and started to complain about the sauce and went on about how he just likes parmesan cheese and butter on his noodles. After I huffed and puffed about it, I caved and said fine. My husband (my dear sweet husband who somehow puts up with my craziness) came over to me and said "Someday Rox it will only be you and I here, and you will wish that you had a little boy come over to you and ask you for butter on his noodles."

He was right. My husband is so right. Even though my babies are still little I am already missing the things they did when they were actual babies. Like the "tiny tommy kisses" Thomas used to give us, how I would rock Chloe to sleep and watch her eyes flutter open just to check that I am still there, holding her. How Jonathan and I used to watch tv while he drank his last bottle before bed, when the bottle was done we would turn off the tv and rock together in the chair as I held him so tightly and wished for that moment to never end.

Those are moments that will be forever in my heart and those are moments that I have to remember when I am impatient.

(chloe, i and thomas at their junior kindergarten christmas concert, dec 2013)


I am my children's soft spot to land. I am their light when their world is dark. I am their motivator, their cheerleader, their warmth, their maker of hot chocolate and marshmallows, the fixer of blankies, the finder of that teenie tiny toy that they must have or they can't fall asleep. I am their life and they are mine.

I need to remind myself that they are growing up and how I act is how they will remember me.

I'm not perfect and will never be. But I can be the best Mom to my kids and show them to not sweat the small stuff.